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Forward Planning

Do you want to know what the future of primary care holds? So do I. This is how the future is being shaped at the moment:
Appointments
We will provide non urgent appointments within 48 hours (under one proposal). That’s non urgent. Urgent appointments presumably within 48 minutes-unless it’s an emergency in which case obviously (or not) A+E might be better.
If they are open.
You stand roughly a 92% chance of being seen there within 4 hrs of attending as an emergency.
If you are not sure which A+E to go to then please ask a friend. Or your family. If you are really still not sure, you could always go to the nearest one. Or go to your GP (then repeat the process ad nauseum or until feeling better).
If you have had an accident or have an emergency then please do not attend your GP as they are trying hard to reach targets. The main target is the desk-aimed at by their head. Fortunately the blow is frequently cushioned by paperwork from NHSE/CCG/CQC etc etc.
Development
Primary care services are looking to integrate-with anybody who will have them. Applications must be submitted with details provided of exactly how many extra votes this will provide for the relevant political party come May 2015.
All applications will be considered-if looking to include alternative non NHS providers then those that pay a modicum of tax in the UK will be given greater priority. For example-Café Nero over Starbucks, Butlins Health over Amazon etc.
Applications must be submitted by hand, and should be signed in original ink on the back of the Elgin Marbles by Aneurin Bevan. Must be with NHSE by 3pm this afternoon to access part of the £2.54 extra initiative, cost cutting, vote winning, frail and clueless political party fund. This fund is not ring-fenced and can also be accessed at the House of Commons bar so please apply early.
Retention
The workforce is clearly under pressure and the government is trying to work out why this might be. They are going to ask people nicely if they would consider a career in General Practice. To help lure them, they will slag them off in the press, fiddle around with their pension, reduce the overall primary care budget, ask them to spend hours each week trying to commission services whilst running a business and trying to see patients, and help them to maintain focus by ensuring they spend as little time as possible at home. Interested? Please fill in the 26 page wellbeing assessment form which you can obtain from your GP and ask for an appropriate referral.

Oh well-you can only do your best, even in the most testing of conditions. The majority of GPs I know simply want to get on with the core work of caring for patients. I admire (and feel sorry for) those that have the energy and will to engage with the political process of organising primary care.
I for one will be eternally grateful when that boutique coffee shop finally opens beside the Citizen’s advice bureau office just along the corridor from me…
Richard Cook
January 2015

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